Rhubarb Report: Episode 41

I can say without hesitation that this week may go down on record as one of the most surreal weeks I have ever experienced. I can remember the feeling when I moved to Austin in 1990, getting off the train and stepping into a brave new world. That was surreal. But when you stand up and take the oath of allegiance to become the citizen of a new country? Now that is truly surreal.

It is hard for most to comprehend what that does to your psyche, your mindset, and your self perception. The best descriptor? It is just … different … now. Suffice it to say that it was a great experience that made for an interesting week that I will certainly never forget.

Besides, now I have an excuse to celebrate May 21 annually!

While that was going on, rumor has it that the world was still turning on its axis. Apparently, truth was still stranger than fiction, and the land of rhubarb was alive and well. I bring to you, hot off the presses, Episode 41.Enjoy!

1. Any triathlete who doubts Lance Armstrong’s return to triathlon is sadly mistaken. I have predicted since, oh, Tour de France victory 3 or 4 or so, that he would eventually make a stunning, dominating return to triathlons. The man himself kept telling the world it wouldn’t happen, but, I just had the feeling that it would.

His return to the sport came at Ironman 70.3 Panama earlier this season. Now, add a victory to the record books. Armstrong won Ironman 70.3 Florida with a time of (shuddering) … 3:45:38. He won the event by 10 minutes. As a coach, I would project that, on the right course, he has an 8:00:00 – 8:15:00 Ironman in him right now. Last time I looked, that would win most of them, including the World Championships.

Any triathlete who doubts his abilities, especially those who doubt his running – need to check those splits:

Swim 0:24:52

Bike 02:01:03

Run 01:15:56

It is only a matter of time before Mike Reilly announces Lance Armstrong as the Ironman Hawaii World Champion. Remember that you heard it here first.

2. I can understand, or at least comprehend, people having a bucket list of items that they want to do before they die. I get the concept at its most basic level. But when those bucket list items are simply to say “I did it”, without any relevance or context to their lives, then I am a  little challenged to understand.

We’ve seen this happen with running a marathon. Sedentary people start training long enough to cross the finish line, collect their medal, and return to their sedentary lives. I don’t get it. Then, the Ironman triathlon started appearing on peoples’ bucket lists. When does a 140.6 mile ultra-endurance event just “pop up” on your bucket list? I don’t get that either.

Now, the latest in what appears to be a growing list of items finding their way onto the bucket lists: climbing Mount Everest.

The bad news is that four people died on Mount Everest last weekend. What makes it compelling, and what makes me wonder, is when the news item quotes a person as saying that

“There was a traffic jam on the mountain on Saturday. Climbers were still heading to the summit as late as 2:30 p.m. which is quite dangerous".

A traffic jam on Mount Everest? Are you crazy? There are that many people on the mountain that it constitutes a traffic jam?

It seems like people will go to great lengths to have a better bucket list accomplishment than the next person. Maybe that says volumes about the general self image of the populace nowadays. Maybe it says something about our adventurous spirit, the “I did it because it was there” mentality. Or maybe it is just plain stupid. You be the judge.

3. Here is one that definitely rates in the “are you serious?” category. According to reports, spectators for the Formula One race in Austin in November will be shuttled into and out of the event – expected to be an 80 minute round trip. If the ticket price wasn’t high enough, add that shuttle fare into the mix as well.

Montreal may have a similar scenario, but Montreal’s F1 circuit on Ile Notre Dame is within walking distance of the metro and downtown. Austin’s F1 circuit is within walking distance of … Elroy. Need I say more?

Oh, and while we’re at it, rumor is that they will only be selling three day passes for the event. If this country wants to get people interested in Formula One, making them commit to a three day ticket isn’t the best way to do so – but I digress.

Photo credits: Wikipedia